In a desperate attempt to ignore the burning narcissism in your loins, you grab your trusty Iphone and excitedly jab with your atrociously henna painted finger at the video record button. Unfortunately, you are a mite too hasty and push the tiny computer out of your hands, smashing disastrously to the floor. The deviously designed device with the lock on casing forces all the kinetic energy of the fall into the delicate touch screen, shattering it into a million pieces, right along with your dreams of viral internet stardom. You cry, mostly because the tiny pieces of glass shards on your bathroom floor are not big enough to break the skin on your wrists with. It becomes clear you are in fact doomed to a life of debt and depression, and no amount of rasslin' skills will save you now.....